Thoughts Approaching the Finish Line

I’m heading back to Nashville with less than an hour left, and for the first time I’m not that excited. Usually when I’m approaching Nashville, I’m completely thrilled because I know that fun times will ensue. But today is different. This moment is bittersweet because heading towards Belmont means that the 40/40 trip has come to an end.

It seems like just a couple days ago I was on a plane headed for Nashville in order to embark on this “trip of a life time.” Even then, this academic excursion seemed like something that would not really happen. I kept thinking that I was dreaming and that someone would soon wake me and inform me that I wasn’t really going anywhere. But the fact of the matter is that never happened. I, in fact, have been across the country and have seen more than I ever expected to see and done more as well. I sat on the same steps of Central High School that the Little Rock Nine once ascended towards integration. I saw my first Broadway show in New York City and I was completely enthralled despite the fact that I didn’t have an actual seat. I saw extreme poverty coupled with infectious hope on the Navajo reservation in New Mexico. I caught a glimpse of the ugliness of oppression while Memphis. I ate awesome seafood in Seattle. I saluted Abraham Lincoln at his memorial in D.C. I watched All American fireworks in Boston on the 4th of July. I floated lazily in the Atlantic Ocean and loved the briny taste.

It’s interesting because I expected to have a clear idea of what it means to be an American when I came back from this trip, but I don’t. I honestly think that I had a better idea of what I thought it meant to be an American before I left. Now I don’t know. There are so many different parts of the United States with such different people that I’m not sure I can say these different people and cultures are united by anything. But maybe I’m just still overwhelmed. Maybe when the dust in my mind settles a little more I’ll be able to process everything a lot better. But even if I can’t process everything, I firmly believe that this trip has been worth it. The fact I am now questioning what I knew to be certain before shows me that I’ve been impacted by this experience. And that impact will continue to manifest for weeks and maybe even months to come. Maybe this isn’t the end. Maybe it’s just the beginning.